i've had recurring dreams since i was a kid, and there's a version of my hometown that exists only in my mind, only when i'm asleep, and there are so many recurring patterns and places and plotpoints that i have to start recording. one day i might not remember, so i'm making myself remember now.

as i've begun writing out these memories, i realize that everything radiates out from main street: it's where i grew up, where i went to school and played sports, how i got to my grandparents' or my church, where i ran (for the most part), where the parades traveled and where i always seemed to be. it feels almost musical or symbolic - i grew up on main street, and my memories radiate out from main street. that's as poetic as i tend to get, and i guess i'm okay with it. at least i can make these nightmares - because they tend to be nightmares - connect and intertwine and feel less foreign and intrusive.

here's what i want to add & do as time goes on

locations & associated phenomena:

• sports fields west of the center of town
• the napa store, plopped down on the wrong side of town
• so many places get picked up and moved but still retain everything about themselves, like the buildings hold all the information and meaning and the context isn't necessary.
• there's this house down old 32 towards williamsburg and it's behind trees, out beside the subdivision where my friend used to live. the house is hidden and big but also rather indistinct - in memory, it feels rather stereotypically subdivision-esque. it's always lit from within, very warm yellowy lamps and porchlights. there isn't a consistent family or person associated with the house, but it's for sure not sitting empty; there are people there, and they're involved in whatever goes on in the front yard more often than not.
• the exit onto the highway
• the middle school

...and everything else:

• audiovisual hallucinations d/b/a sleep paralysis